Kobe and Shaq like kids, each other?

After reading this story, we officially don’t believe in coincidences.

Both Kobe Bryant and Shaquille O’Neal welcomed children into the world early Monday morning — Kobe’s second and Shaq’s nineteenth.

(The chances are slim that Todd Helton is the mother.)

The oddest part about this story is that the two girls were born six minutes apart in real time, which equates to about 25 seconds off the clock in a basketball game. We don’t know how this is possible, but refuse to accept that it was simply a coincidence. Phil Jackson’s Zen powers could be involved, as could the growing (?) love affair between Kobe and Shaq.

The media seems to get off to depicting their distaste for each other, but we don’t buy it after this. We’re guessing they told Helton their wives to hold off on giving birth for as long as possible so their daughters could be born at exactly the same time — for kicks or something. They then would have exchanged hugs, high-fives, fist-pounds, ass-slaps, cheek-kisses and some pancakes for breakfast.

-Adam Landres-Schnur

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