Can’t we just win a lousy game?

We don’t often go on rants at this site. It’s not really our thing and it’s not fair to you, the reader. We also rarely talk about our favorite teams. We leave the Washington Huskies to our other site and we prefer not to discuss the San Francisco Giants here.

But today anything goes.

The team they used to call the Giants forgot to play baseball last week. They have lost seven-straight, with the last six (two sweeps) coming at the hands of the mighty Washington Nationals and Pittsburgh Pirates. Yeah, two cellar dwellers just wiped their asses with the Giants.

But as the trade deadline comes and passes today, the Giants are in a bind. They are playing well enough to beat a Little League team, but probably couldn’t escape a high school team. (And not an all-star high school team. Just the regular high school squad). They haven’t won in a week and have a team morale equivalent to that of the U.S. soccer team.

But, playing in the NL West, they’re only four games behind first-place San Diego. So they’re right in the thick of things despite playing uninspired baseball. So what does the Giants’ dumbass GM decide to do? Well, likely nothing.

Though we think it’s time to sell, sell, sell. Even Grant, over at the mighty McCovey Chronicles thinks it may be time to lay it down. And Jason Schmidt has gotta be that guy. Pitchers are a hot commodity and there are few good ones available this season.

To give up a front-line guy like Schmidt, the Giants could come away with young, major-league-ready talent. Schmidt, who’s a free agent at the end of the year anyway, is likely gone. So trade him now, get overpaid for him and start thinking towards Notthisyear. It seems too obvious, right?

Well, Brian Sabean has been known to do non-obvious things, like trade for a dickhead catcher and give up Francisco Liriano, Joe Nathan and the best first name in baseball, Boof Bonser.

And then there’s manager Felipe Alou who’s about as bright as this breakfast cereal. (Drop a comment if you get the reference. Don’t worry if you don’t. It’s a local thang). Alou makes three pitching changes an inning, always opts for the righty vs. righty matchup rather than going with the hot-hand and rather than having an ace up his sleeve, he has the two of spades.

There’s just not a whole lot that makes sense in Giants camp these days. But hey, it’s baseball. Just baseball. Oh wait, excuse us while we vomit.

In other baseball news: The Phillies traded Bobby Abreu and Cory Lidle to the Yankees Sunday for a “night on the town” with New York manager Joe Torre.


3 Responses

  1. Nice youtube clip…quality. As far as the Yankees go. If Abreu plays like the old Abreu, this is an amazing move for the good ol yanks.

  2. Oh no you di-int!!! Although, you can’t just blame old cream-of-wheat, you have to give some credit for this slide to the “brain dead carribeans hacking at slop.”

  3. “cream of wheat” is Alou’s unofficial nickname after Larry Krueger’s (and later, the Morning Show’s) comments about the lack of hitting by the Giants. I prefer to call him “the pope” after his self-righteous tirade on Krueger…what is it, a year ago? something like that?

    Just some thoughts – Alou always looks like he’s sleeping in the dugout. Always. He rivals Ken Macha for lack of alertness. Also, looks like whenever he is awake for a few minutes, he goes to the bullpen. Most people hit the snooze alarm when they wake up, Felipe signals to bring in a lefty. Last thought: Last year, people kept criticizing Alou for not letting pitchers stay out on the mound for a while (i.e. reliever comes in, gives up a walk or hit, and immediately gets yanked). This year it seems like he’s doing the opposite to prove those critics wrong – he’ll leave pitchers out there too long, letting them fuck up.

    Let me know if you want to go to a future Giants or A’s game – I guess the unofficial drinking game is 1 shot per time Alou or Macha are poked in an attempt to wake them up.

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