"Would you do…" Tournament: No. 4 Melissa Stark vs. No. 5 Bonnie Bernstein

(If you don’t know what the hell the “Would you do…” Tournament is all about, read this first).

Winner’s gonna give Andrews fits in the Final Four.

No. 4 Melissa Stark:


Why we might: She’s really freakin’ hot — nice hair, eyes, chest, legs, feet, chest.
Why we might not: She’s so hot that we could never enjoy banging a normal girl after running through her.
Regular season “record”: 22 yes-0 no (the only perfect record).
First round: Defeated Linda Cohn 93%-7%.
Ladies… breakdown.

No. 5 Bonnie Bernstein:


Why we might:
Look at the second picture with the red suit. Whoa! That shit is probably more air-brushed than a Playboy spread, but still…hello! She looks ripe and eager…(and may be bottomless in that photo)!
Why we might not: She’s 36, and again, if she’s Jewish, she’s probably got a nice resumé…not a professional resume if you catch our drift. Her number of partners probably mirrors her salary!
Regular season “record”: 23 yes-2 no.
First round: Defeated Michelle Tafoya 89%-11%.
Ladies… breakdown.

Who would you rather do?
Melissa Stark
Bonnie Bernstein
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20 Responses

  1. This one will be a tight race. The Ladies revealed that Bernstein is a gymnast, so that tips the scales for BB.

  2. This may be as classic of a match-up such as Duke-Kentucky…

    Every vote WILL count!

  3. On paper, Stark should win this. But this tourney is played out in the sack, not on paper, and my nuts tell me that Bernstein would be a lot more fun in the sack than Stark. Since my nuts rarely steer me wrong, I’ll go B-squared here.

  4. Blonde vs Brunette, UVA vs. Maryland, Gymnast vs. Tennis player, So hard…to choose.

    Here is the thing. B-squared’s profile kills it for me.. and the stupid hats.

  5. I voted for Stark. I can’t let a fellow Wahoo down. But I agree that BB is probably way better in the sack.

  6. I gotta go with Stark. She reminds me of a chick I used to bang in college…not a real tiger but man she would let me do Anything.

  7. four-time Academic All-American in Gymnastics
    Changed my vote!

  8. By far the toughest decision I have had to make in months. Which one would I rather see in Penthouse? I guess I’ll go Stark.

  9. BB’s leg clot also was partially caused by the type of birth control she was on, the USA Today article said. BB’s trying pretty hard to make it into the final four…

  10. I agree about B2’s clot was caused by organic birth control or some shit…

    Just shows she is taking it on a regular basis and is in no mood to settle down

  11. anonymous hit the nail on the head:

    Academic All-American Gymnast!!!

    Brains, beauty, and flexibility

    (from Maryland, even better)

  12. This is a shocker…not so much that Starks is going to win…but she is winning quite easily…

  13. this is a tough one. I think I’m going to go with BB.

  14. I’m going the way of the upset. BB might seem all prim and proper, but let’s not forget she went to Maryland. Even before the sex, you’re going to drink yourself stupid, make fun of those less fortunate, and burn furniture. Yes, yes, and yes.

  15. a true ACC battle, but UVA will come out on top once again! Don’t forget: a wahoo is a fish that can drink its own weight.

  16. I am surprised that Stark is winning handily. I also think BB would tear your ass up and Stark, to me, would be a gentle lady, but what the hell do I know…….

  17. Melissa Stark is rumored to get her stories in the lockerroom. Think about it.

  18. Hot. Gymnast.

    Let that settle in your minds for a minute.

    Stark may have the MILF vote, but Bonnie doesn’t need to call a babysitter….

  19. >>if she’s Jewish, she’s probably got a nice resumé…not a professional resume if you catch our drift. Her number of partners probably mirrors her salary!
    >>

    I’m not sure if I catch your drift. Do you mean they sleep around? Where the heck did you get this idea? Did you happen to bang two of them and then extrapolate?

  20. BB. Everything about her says “slut, whore and REALLY fun in bed.” Since I love sluts, love whores and prefer a woman who’s really fun in bed versus a mere hot chick, BB wins in my book.

    Stark’s got the body, for sure, but the hotter the chick, the less likely she’s gonna be stunning in the sack. Pretty can only get you so far.

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