"Would you do…" Tournament: No. 2 Suzy Kolber vs. No. 7 Rachel Nichols

(If you don’t know what the hell the “Would you do…” Tournament is all about, read this first).

We sense that Kolber is performing poorly as of late. Kind of like Wisconsin, if you will. Nichols squeezed by Sam Ryan in Round 1, winning by less than 30 votes. Something’s gotta give.

No. 2 Suzy Kolber:

Why we might: Joe Namath practically begged to. And he’s famous and could probably land some quality 60-year-old tail.
Why we might not: Joe Namath practically begged to.
Regular season “record”: 36 yes-4 no.
First round: Defeated Jeanne Zelasko 66%-34%.
Ladies… breakdown.

No. 7 Rachel Nichols:

Why we might: If you watch Nichols do an ESPN report, you’ll notice that this redhead doesn’t blink. Like ever.

That really has no impact on our decision, except we’ll go ahead and speculate that she doesn’t, um, gag, either. We see cucumbers, kielbasas and tree branches coming into play.

Why we might not: We can’t rule out that a threesome might involve another dude. Nichols might be the type who bangs other dudes while her husband watches in the corner, sips a mixed drink and strokes his dick beard.

A situation like that has all the makings for something going very wrong. This could be the type of threesome where you wake up the next morning without a major organ and just a note that says, “You can find your kidney at the local flea market. It’s being sold for $10 or best offer. Thanks for a good time. XOXO.”

Regular season “record”: 18 yes-3 no.
First round: Defeated Sam Ryan 51%-49%.
Ladies… breakdown.

Some one is cutting down the nets. The other is going home.

Who would you rather do?
Suzy Kolber
Rachel Nichols
pollcode.com free polls

20 Responses

  1. I don’t know about the others but I voted for Kolber because any national sports reporter who has the balls… sorry, guts… to go on camera wearing a top with no bra that becomes slightly see-thru when in front of bright tv lights (last pic in row…)( gets my vote!

  2. Rachel Nichols scares me. And I like it. Suzy is just a little too dykey (is that a word? it is now) for my taste.

  3. can I vote for sam ryan again instead?

  4. Check out my new blog at

  5. Think about this, it took a DRUNK Joe Namath to hit on Kolber…I think a sober Broadway Joe wouldn’t have bothered…

    Nichols in the upset!!!

  6. Im going with the slutty looking redhead…….Still cant decide if kolber likes guys or gals……

  7. Suzy would have had my vote except she’s now sporting some sort of mullet-like hair.

    Rachel all the way now.

  8. I think it’s too bad Sam Ryan is out of this, but how in the hell is Rachel Nichols WINNING against Suzy Kolber? Rachel Nichols is not attractive.

  9. When was Broadway Joe ever sober? I am going for Kolber.

  10. I don’t think either of them are clearly better looking than the other. Rachel seems like she’d be a LOT more fun, though.

    Put another way, Suzy is creepy while Rachel is Creepy-Hot. It’s subtle, but there’s a difference.

  11. It looks like our first big upset of the tournament….Rachel Nichols is Cinderella

  12. i to have an open thread at http://www.ssreporters.blogspot.com.

    To kick off it’s 1st week put up on the web.

  13. ihave an open thread at http://www.ssreporters.blogspot.com.

    Wrong copy and paste!

    To kick off it’s 1st week put up on the web.

  14. Kolber has got to be a lesbian (not that there’s anyting wrong with that). I’m goin with Rachel

  15. UNLV 7 seed, Rachel Nichols 7 seed. Coincidence? I think not

  16. The first upset of the tournament. Finally.

  17. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! It looks like Nichols will pull off the upset! For anyone that has been reading these boards they know I am the biggest advocate of Nichols out there. I love her. She is so hot in my opinion and that lovely little smile she gives at the end of each piece makes me turn red. I love the woman and I am glad she will advance in the tourney!

  18. Some additions to the series:

    Shannon Spake – just saw her on ESPN. 🙂

    Who is the poker series chick? Yeah, not espn, but if Poker is on ESPN all the time, why not?

  19. Just to be fair I would have to do both and then decide…although I keep thinking about a piece of wisdom my grandpa passed along to me – You can’t tell how a girl is going to f#$% by how she looks…but it is a lot easier imagining doing the hotties

  20. I would fuck Suzy and fuck her hard

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