Yao Ming could do like waaay better

Hey, Yao Ming’s getting married. To a woman.

China’s All Star NBA centre Yao Ming will wed his teenage sweetheart Ye Li from Shanghai in August, after an eight-year courtship, state press reported Monday.

“This is a match based on pure love,” the paper said.

Pure love. So that’s what they call it now. Ask Yao why they’re getting married and he’d say, “性是粪,” which is Chinese for, “the sex is the shit.”

The bed-play better be good cuz this gal ain’t exactly gonna turn heads. Um, do they make kegs of Long Islands? They better fucking start…

But her personality must be a 10. That, or she can do some wild shit with her tongue.

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28 Responses

  1. This reminds me of a shtick they had on the TV show Arrested Development (one of the funniest shows ever)… one kid was dating a plain-looking girl, so any conversation he had about her with anyone else basically went like this:

    “I love her. She’s really funny.”
    “I’d hope so.”

  2. Either that, or the conversation went like this:

    “I’m in love with Ann.”
    “Her?”

  3. 20 dolla – sucky sucky…yes…sucky sucky

  4. She’s at least 6 feet tall!!! The Chinese are going to take over the world.

  5. judging by the fact that Yao is 7’5″ or whatever, and she come up to his shoulder, she has got to be like 6’7″!!

  6. she’s probably the only Chinese babe that can take the Yao Ding

  7. she is 6’3″ and plays for the chinese national basketball team (or at least she used to).

  8. Since when has getting married cut into an NBA player’s action?
    This girl is for making giant Yao babies.
    She’s not that bad looking anyway and probably won’t baloon up after having kids. More picture of her here:
    http://sports.sohu.com/1/0903/84/subject213788439.shtml

  9. Here’s a link that works-
    http://tinyurl.com/2dq6cf

  10. She really isn’t that bad looking. The pic on the site is horrible, but the ones on the above links are pretty good.

  11. What, is she funny or something?

  12. oh yeah, i’d throw it in her gash

  13. first, yao is not that hot and most women would not want to have him for a relationship because he is freakishly tall.

    second, ever see Lebron James? Yuck, that guy’s face looks like a train hit it. That nose is flat as a pancake. He has a baby’s momma, but, beside some chick wanting to be tagged, he will never be in a loving relationship with a real hot chick. By your standards, Lebron, with that ugly fucking face of his couldn’t get a woman based on his looks.

    third, Yao probably is in love with a nice girl whom he has something in common with.

    fourth, you bitches and faggots couldn’t get hot chicks. No way. You couldn’t possibly hang with cute girls. None of you could. I can, because I am young, handsome and successful.

  14. You’re new to this whole sports blogosphere, aren’t you?

  15. anon 12:03, Yao is not that hot, huh???

    Thanks, that was a well-thought out post.

  16. “性是粪” translates into “Sex is shit” ….. exact opposite of the shit, so I don’t know if you made that up or what, lol. Good for Yao! Can I write a check?

  17. Oi, achei teu blog pelo google tá bem interessante gostei desse post. Quando der dá uma passada pelo meu blog, é sobre camisetas personalizadas, mostra passo a passo como criar uma camiseta personalizada bem maneira. Até mais.

  18. Twins, Arrested Development is a hilarious show. I liked Michael’s line: “It’s as Ann as the nose on plain’s face!” Or something to that effect.

    As for Yao, she does seem to be very tall. Maybe that was high on his priority list. Perhaps he is working to replenish the Chinese national basketball team and he wants the best gene pool available.

  19. The level of racism in these comments is nauseating. Perhaps other cultures have different, but equally valid ideas of what “beautiful” means? And that they’d rather have a loving wife than a psychotic bulimia victim?

  20. Wasn’t Yao supposed to be dating Nia Long or something?

  21. You guys just don’t understand China… That’s Yao’s official wife… she is not the only hen on the Yao farm 🙂

  22. What’s wierd about the link that someone posted with multiple pictures of her is that she looks very different with varied degree quality of her look.

  23. Who needs looks when u got $$$$. NBA players or pro athletes for that matter make millions of dollars, that alone will get you a groupies. Even the benchriders can pull a groupie or 2.

  24. I can’t tell which one is her in the links above. Are they all pictures of her, or different members of her team. Now I know why the Chinese student association comes to the door I bounce.

  25. no offense but they will make the tallest player in the entire world!!!

  26. (on a sign 6’9″ off the ground in China)
    You must be at least this tall to ride the Yao.

  27. Yao could have gotten a psycho cracker skank like Britney Spears {+( You know, Ye Le would never marry any of you losers hehehe.

  28. You’re all a bunch of bigoted stupid assholes! You all seem to think you’re so funny…

    Get a life you bunch of immature jerks!

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