"Would you do… Round 2" Tournament: No. 8 Danica Patrick vs. No. 9 Cat Osterman

(If you don’t know what the hell the “Would you do… Round 2” Tournament is all about, read this first).

No. 8 vs. No. 9. Heads or tails?

No. 8 Danica Patrick:


Why we might:
Make-up and airbrushes are wonderful things. Thanks, FHM.
Why we might not: Allow The Hater Nation to put things in perspective: “She looks like a mix between the ‘runaway bride’ and Terri Schiavo.” (Without make-up, yes. Yes she does)..
Regular season “record”: 83% yes-17% no.

No. 9 Cat Osterman:


Why we might:
She looks awfully flexible. Check out this photo. She’s galloping like fucking Barbaro. Probably translates well in the sack.
Why we might not: Osterman is lanky as hell. She’s built like Yao fucking Ming. The only difference is that she’s a woman. And she doesn’t play basketball. And she’s not Chinese.
Regular season “record”: 75% yes-25% no.

Who gets Stokke in Round 2?

Who would you rather do?
Danica Patrick
Cat Osterman
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15 Responses

  1. This is a tough one because both do not really do nothing for me (but that doesn’t mean that I would not fuck them)

    Danica just seems dirty to me…and I don’t mean good dirty…I mean dirty dirty

    I voted for Cat because she seems cleaner…but also because she seems like she would be a freakin nut in bed…like she would want to shave the hair off my ass then fuckin glue it on her pussy…that kinda turns me on…

  2. Danica all the way. Since she can’t win a race, she should at least be able to win this competition

  3. Danica’s got that girl-next-door-with-a-hint-of-skank vibe typical for girls from the rural Midwest. Love that shit. Girls like that will play coy at first and will get all tomboyish and stuff, but then you get into them and they just let you fuck them silly. And they show you some tricks you’ve never done before (or at least, with her). Danica, Danica, Danica.

    Cat on the other hand just looks, weel, absolutely gross. Why is she even ranked in this contest?

  4. Danica for me, I think she’s hot. Cat’s not bad either but this was an easy decision.

  5. Cat’s tongue out picture is such a boner-detracter.

    Danica has a chance to take out Stokke, I’m calling it now.

    If Terry Schiavo was in this tournament, she would win hands (and pulse) down.

  6. I don’t know all that, G. Danica is hot. But Stokke’s young AND hot. For me, it’s a difficult choice between those two; it may be easier for others, but not by much.

    It will be relatively close, but Stokke will probably beat Danica 59-41.

  7. Why is Osterman even in this thing? She’s on a very short list of women that would make me choose Danica. Gross.

  8. In the words of the imortal Jeff Spicoli, “you guys are fags.”

    How is this even a contest?

  9. Danica brings back Winnie Cooper memories. She’s a must-do.

  10. I can’t believe that 55 people think Osterman is hot enough to do. Serena Williams has a better body — and got only 29 people to vote for her. Apparently, some of you guys prefer dick over good pussy.

  11. good call about winnie cooper. Now I like her even more…

    strangely enough, the girl who played Winnie Cooper is named DANICA. Danica McKellar. Weird.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Danica_mckellar
    http://www.danicamckellar.com/

  12. sevenmack,

    don’t ever stop commenting here! these are gems!

  13. Thanks Big Picture.

    Ah, Danica McKellar and Danica Patrick. And I, stuck between them, in a sex sandwich. Aaah. When you get caught between hot and sexy pussy…

  14. I just think Cat would be a freak in bed…

  15. Good lord, the only possible way to do Patrick would be to turn her around so you wouldn’t have those vapid eyes staring at you. Blah.

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