Pettitte: ‘I’m sorry’

I’m sorry I took steroids.

I’m sorry I ate the last cookie.

I’m sorry I told you the tooth fairy isn’t real.

I’m sorry I left the toilet seat up.

I’m sorry I inhaled in high school.

I’m sorry I looked at Jeter in the shower.

I’m sorry I used sage instead of saffron in the rice.

I’m sorry I charged that hotel porn to A-Rod’s room.

I’m sorry Clemens and I got loaded and set some beavers loose in the furniture store.

I’m sorry I lost those five playoff games.

I’m sorry I went to the National League.

I’m sorry about the beef recall.

I’m sorry I used to stay up late at night when I was 12 and try to make out the boobs in between the squiggly lines.

I’m sorry I called our Boy Scout leader a homo.

I’m sorry I dragged you to see Death Becomes Her.

I’m sorry I ate the chili from 7-Eleven.

I’m sorry I got caught.


2 Responses

  1. Goldie Hawn! Meryl Streep! How could this miss!?

  2. Nice. Come check out my latest post on this issue.

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