The Pirates could be World Champions (if they played the Giants more often)


No need to sugarcoat this: The Pittsburgh Pirates are a very bad team and have been for a very long time. They haven’t had a .500+ season since 1992. That was only a year after the fall of the Soviet Union! Yeeesh.

Normally, we’d sympathize for an organization in such shambles. But not the Pirates. We fucking hate the Pirates. If their sunflower seeds tasted like spoiled sour cream that’d be fine. We’d also like it if they never learned to read.

Because, Jesus, they fucking kill our San Francisco Giants.

After the Pirates 5-4 win yesterday, which completed a three-game sweep, they are now 20-8 against the Giants dating back to 2004. That’s a .714 winning percentage. Their winning percentage over that five-year span is .427.

The Giants haven’t exactly been a successful team during that time period, either. But still. They’re the Pirates.

Now please, Pittsburgh, go lose 10 in a row. And may your iPods only play Hannah Montana songs.

Gorgeous park, though.

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5 Responses

  1. I can’t fucking stand the Pirates. I guess this must be karmic payback for taking barry bonds from them and destroying their franchise. fuck.

  2. As far as comparing the cities…400 pound chicks are clearly superior over gay men.

  3. At least Pittsburgh has fewer Libtards than SF. Sheesh. What’s a gallon of gas running nowadays in SF? How about a 3 BR, 1.5 Bath home? How’s it working out with no plastic bags at the supermarket? I’ll sell ya some Giant Eagle bags on EBay if you need ’em. HAHAHA. World Series titles: Pit: 5 SF: 0. Looks like that move to SF really paid off. Oh yea, how’s Barry Zit0 doing? LOL, oops, that should be Zit0000000. lol.

  4. Sorry ’bout that double post; toddler on lap.

  5. I grew up in the burgh, and all i’m gonna say is that it’s a damn good town full of decent, honest, hardworking folks. We haven’t seen baseball glory for a while, but I do believe that the bucs are getting closer to fielding a decent club (fingers crossed). If not we always have the Steeler Nation (one of the largest worldwide fan bases for any professional sports team…oh and five superbowl championships). peace yinz!!!
    PS-we have way fewer flaming homos than San Fran also. Have a nice day!

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