Shouldn’t some one take a flier on Barry Bonds?

The days are longer, the sun is brighter and there’s baseball in the air. Spring Training is underway and for the next month, you can talk about how your team has a chance at the playoffs, if X pitcher wins X games, X player has an .XXX OBP and just about everything else breaks right.

Hey, the Giants are 0-0 right now, tied for first and haven’t yet lost 100 games. Times are good!

But with all the optimism in the air surrounding your favorite team, why hasn’t any team jumped the gun on Barry Bonds yet?

Sure, he’s 1.) A legal issue and 2.) A PR nightmare, but teams can’t complain about his .276 batting average, .480 on-base, .565 slugging, 28 jacks and 75 runs scored in 126 games last season.

It’s clear he’s become a defensive liability, but just about any AL West team could use his services and DH him. Hell, if an NL team could get him on the cheap, platoon him in left field. At this point, a guy like Bonds could put a good team over the hump. And he’s close to achieving some milestones; that’ll put fans in the seats.

We’ll see what happens. But we suppose Kangaroo court is the least of his worries.


Thoughts on #756

The wait is over.

The post-home run ceremony was tasteful, we think, especially the Hank Aaron video-message tribute. It was a nice touch.

We aren’t feeling anything, good or bad. Our reaction wasn’t one of excitement or disapproval, joy or anger. We didn’t cheer or boo. It was a feeling best expressed by a favorite quote: “So that happened.”

Some fan — not even a Giants fan — just won the lottery.

And Mike Bacsik is the answer to a trivia question.

Bonds guessing game

When big records are close to falling, it’s time to play meaningless games! (!!!!!!) Like, when will Bonds break the record? It could be September at this rate.

In the comments, your guesses for what date Barry will hit No. 756. Double kudos for guessing the pitcher. (Full schedule here).

Winner (or closest to actual date) gets a mediocre-to-bad handjob from NFL Adam.

(Another contest at the always-wonderful The Big Lead).

Bonds’ former mistress likes talking and being naked

We find it perfectly reasonable that Barry Bonds’ ex mistress is willing to talk to the public about her relationship with the soon-to-be home run king; she did testify in front of a grand jury after all.

And hey, who better to talk to than Playboy! While naked!

The Playboy article, accompanied by a nude pictorial of Kimberly Bell, is scheduled to hit newsstands Oct. 1. The 37-year-old Bell said the article will cover details of her relationship with Bonds that she told a grand jury investigating the perjury allegations in 2005.

We’re happy to report that the photo shoot was “one of the most liberating experiences” of her life. Removing your clothing has that effect, we’re told.

Oh, and for the record, when we venture a peek at Playboy we don’t read the articles. Like ever.

Adam Landres-Schnur

Boston Fans Wuss Out on Bonds

(Hey kids, this is Marco from Just Call Me Juice. I’ll be the first of your guest writers while Zach is off getting drunk in the woods)

Zach isn’t even here, but you are getting a post about the Giants. That’s because since I now live in Boston, I got to see Barry’s “epic” trip to Fenway last weekend. And after almost a week of build up by the Boston media as to how bad the fans would treat Bonds, the Sox fans were actual quite terrible in their heckling of Bonds. Hell, Barry even said he enjoyed his trip to Boston. Yes, the same Boston he said was too racist for him to ever play there. I don’t think you would ever hear that from Barry about Philly, a place that knows how to boo. Very disappointing with zero creativity. Asterisks? Wow, never saw that one coming. Syringes? Very original.

I made my into Fenway for Game 3 of the series, the one where Bonds took Wakefield deep. You could actually hear some cheering after Bonds hit the homer (granted, their was a large number of Giants fans in Fenway….who knew they traveled?) which was eventually turned into boos. I guess with all of the creative taunting of A-Rod and the rest of the Yankees over the years, I expected too from Sox fans. Oh well, I’ll just have to go back to throwing D-Batteries at Bonds from the outfield of Citizens Bank Park in Philly and hating Sox fans. At least Philly fans know how to heckle. And oh yeah, fuck (wouldn’t be a TBP post without fuck, would it?)