Guest Post: Cowboys should make for good TV

A few weeks ago we challenged readers to a friendly game of Torch Run. Those who beat our ridiculously good score were offered porn links, a free subscription to the site or a guest post.

And our boy Chris Stuckey took us up on the free post! Chris is a 20-year-old Texan who’s well, from Texas. Chris roots for the Cowboys, Rangers, Stars, Mavericks and even the AFL’s Desperados. Chris has met Quincy Carter and Nate Newton, who may or may not have tried to deal him 50 pounds of grass. Chris gives his take — from a Dallas fan’s perspective — on the Cowboys being the subject of “Hard Knocks.” Take it away…

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HBO and NFL Films nailed it. Could they have chosen a better team to feature on their annual training camp documentary “Hard Knocks”? The Dallas Cowboys are probably the most intriguing team in the league when you combine both the on- and off-the-field elements. My sources informed me that the Bengals were also in running, but supposedly COPS already had dibs on them.

The possible storylines for HBO and NFL Films to follow are endless…

Tony Romo: He has obviously been one of America’s endless “feel good” stories that subsequently gets shoved down by your MSMers, but I must admit this…I have a ginormous man crush on him. I’ve never had feelings like this before and I’m actually starting worry about myself.

Jessica Simpson: Even if you hate the Cowboys, you have to like Jessica. What could be better than combining football with a hot, large-breasted blonde? Who from last year’s edition of “Hard Knocks” featuring the Chiefs got the most pub on the blogosphere? That’s right, it was Brodie Croyle’s hot ass wife. The Cowboys training camp site for 2008 is Oxnard, Calif., which is about an hour outside of Los Angeles. We have to have a Jessica sighting in one of the episodes.

Terrell Owens: I’m already getting my popcorn ready… When you put T.O. in front of a camera, you never know what might happen.

Jerry Jones: Is there an owner that craves attention more than Jerry? Jerry has recently been talking in vivid detail about Felix Jones’ butt quite a bit. Frankly, it makes me pretty uncomfortable.

And last but not least…

Pacman Jones (possibly): How could you not feature this guy? He is bound to get caught in a strip club before the end of the year. From what I hear, Zach has pledged to monitor as many strip clubs as possible throughout the US and plans to keep Jerry informed.

Bottom line: Kudos to HBO and NFL Films for locking down the ‘Boys. The prominent personalities combined with Jessica and the inevitable story about an undrafted free agent’s attempt to make the team should make for must see TV.

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Guest Post: What’s All the Buzz?

A few weeks ago we challenged readers to a friendly game of Torch Run. Those who beat our ridiculously good score were offered porn links, a free subscription to the site or a guest post.

And our boy Gonzo took us up on the free post! Gonzo, who has a Phillies tattoo, is best known for hitting a bases-clearing double in his first at-bat of the Little League World Series tournament and for participating in the 2006 World Series of Darts. He claims to resemble Chris Elliott, Dr. Greene from ER, Jerry Seinfeld and, our favorite, former Giants pitcher Kirk Reuter.

Gonzo weighs in on the Buzz Bissinger fiasco from the perspective of a blog and MSM reader. Play nice…

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“The future in the hands of guys like you is really, really gonna dumb us down to a degree that I don’t know we can recover from.”- Buzz Bissinger talking about Deadspin’s WIll Leitch on Costas NOW.

I have to admit, he may be right.

I hope you aren’t getting all riled up, because I would hate for someone to form an opinion about me without hearing the entire story. The same way you may have formed an opinion of Matt Leinart after a scandalous picture of him holding a beer bong on Deadspin before hearing THAT entire story (This one’s a quickie. He’s 24 years old and has millions of dollars. Would he be better off posing for the Wall Street Journal holding a stock ticker?).

How many times have you Googled Deadspin or The Big Picture in order to get last night’s scores? None. I save that for ESPN.com and Yahoo Sports. How many times have you gone to similar blogs to get a firm, solid, true sports opinion on why Carmona wasn’t pulled in the eighth inning? The answer is none. I save that for Joe Sportswriter who has been in the press box for 162 games per year for the last 24 years. I will gladly read his column top to bottom. How many times have you gone to a blog that is purely satire to grasp the essence of the walk-off homer, three point buzzer beater, or the breakaway goal in overtime? I’m sorry to say, the answer is none.

BUT, how many times have you clicked the link to your favorite blog to see pictures of David Beckham staring at a cheerleader’s ass? LeBron James wearing a Yankees cap at an Indians game? Photos of Erin Andrews looking saucy while reporting that snoozer of a Big Ten game? To see who advanced in the “Who Would You Do?” Bracket? (How the hell did Cavs Amanda lose anyway?)

The answer: EVERY SINGLE DAY.

The future of sports media is NOT in the hands of Will Leitch, AJ Daulerio or anyone going by the name of Balls Deep. The future of sports media is NOT in the hands of Rstiles or Gmoney posting their crude, yet clever opinions on the hotness of the cheerleader of the week.

If the future of sports media is in the hands of bloggers, then you have to admit, Buzz may be right.