Big Picture Categories: Keanu Reeves movies

King’s Cup might be the best drinking game out there. Everyone has their own version, there’s ample drinking and sometimes — on a few lucky occasions — hot chicks end up naked. One of the best “games” in King’s Cup is Categories, which often is represented by the Jack card. In Categories, the person who draws the card says a category (fast food joints, baseball stadiums, etc.) and everyone must go around the circle naming one until somebody stumbles. When that person fucks up, they drink. Make sense? Good.

Today is the release of the new Keanu Reeves flick Street Kings, which may or may not be horrible. It stars Common and The Game, so how could it go wrong? It got us thinking though, since Keanu is without doubt the best actor in the history of acting, we thought we’d brainstorm some of his movies by bringing back Big Picture Categories.

We’ll start and you guys continue in the comments. You can go again after every five comments. One — one! — answer per comment, assbags. If you cheat and look up his IMDB page, we’ll know. And the guilt will cause your penis to fall off.

We’ll start with his best: Point Break.

If you’ve never seen Point Break, well, you should. It’s once of the most acclaimed movies of all time, having won Best Picture awards in multiple years, which we’re told is unprecedented if not impossible. It also won awards for best Foreign Film, best Animated Short and best Documentary, despite not being foreign, animated or true. (Keanu won Best Actor, too, but you already knew that).

Some memorable quotes from Point Break:

Australian cop at the end of the movie: We’ll get him when he comes back in!

Johnny Utah: He’s not coming back.

Roach: Hey man, I’m cold. Really cold.
Johnny Utah: You’re cold because all of the blood is running out of your body Roach. You’re gonna be dead soon.

Johnny Utah: You’re blowing it, man! You’re breaking your own rules…

We know you all love Keanu, so time to slang that knowledge in the comments. (Quotes welcomed!)

Big Picture Categories: sports movies

King’s Cup might be the best drinking game out there. Everyone has their own version, there’s ample drinking and sometimes — on a few lucky occasions — hot chicks end up naked. One of the best “games” in King’s Cup is Categories, which often is represented by the Jack card. In Categories, the person who draws the card says a category (fast food joints, baseball stadiums, etc.) and everyone must go around the circle naming one until somebody stumbles. When that person fucks up, they drink. Make sense? Good.

For how much we like sports, sports movies have never really done it for us. They’re often trite, cliché and corny. Occasionally there will be a good one and, for some, these niche movies really work.

With last weekend’s Academy Awards, movies are on people’s minds. So let’s keep things sports-related and list off some of the best — and inevitably some of the worst — sports flicks of all time. We’ll start and you guys continue in the comments. You can go again after every five comments. One — one! — answer per comment, assbags. First person to mess up has to listen to “Wild Thing” on repeat.

We’ll start with one we quite enjoy: Major League.

All right, movie buffs. Spew your pop-culture knowledge in the comments.

Big Picture Categories: Final Four teams

King’s Cup might be the best drinking game out there. Everyone has their own version, there’s ample drinking and sometimes — on a few lucky occasions — hot chicks end up naked. One of the best “games” in King’s Cup is Categories, which often is represented by the Jack card. In Categories, the person who draws the card says a category (fast food joints, baseball stadiums, etc.) and everyone must go around the circle naming one until somebody stumbles. When that person fucks up, they drink. Make sense? Good.

We’re 10 days until March, which is arguably the best sports month of the year. College hoops, baseball, college hoops. Nets will be getting cut down and courts stormed sooner than you think. We’re close to tourney time and we don’t feel we’ve addressed the college game nearly enough around here.

So let’s get in the mood of March Madness with some tournament-related categories. Today’s game is naming every Final Four team in the history of the Big Dance. We’ll start and you guys continue in the comments. You can go again after every five comments. One — one! — answer per comment, assbags. First person to blow it gets to take a body shot off of Coach K.

We’ll start a great one: George Mason.

Let’s go, tourney fans. Make it happen in the comments.

Big Picture Categories: NBAers from the ACC

King’s Cup might be the best drinking game out there. Everyone has their own version, there’s ample drinking and sometimes — on a few lucky occasions — hot chicks end up naked. One of the best “games” in King’s Cup is Categories, which often is represented by the Jack card. In Categories, the person who draws the card says a category (fast food joints, baseball stadiums, etc.) and everyone must go around the circle naming one until somebody stumbles. When that person fucks up, they drink. Make sense? Good.

We’ve ignored the NBA up until this point. It’s a boring league, with whiny superstars and the hoops are too motherfucking low. Raise that shit to 11 feet already!

But our neglect stops here. With so little going on sports wise, it’s time to embrace the NBA as your best friend. If you hate it like us, learn to love it. Or just root for the Warriors. They play like a college team anyway. But since the NBA has far fewer players than the NFL or MLB, we couldn’t stick to one alma mater — like in these posts.

Since the ACC is the premier league in the land (the Pac-10 ain’t too shabby, either), today’s category will be naming all current NBA players who went to ACC universities. We’ll start and you guys continue in the comments. You can go again after every five comments. One — one! — answer per comment, assbags. First person to mess up has to root for Duke for two weeks.

We’ll start with a basket case, because, well, who doesn’t like a superstar nutjob? Steve Francis (Maryland).

Let’s go, college hoops (and soon-to-be NBA) fans. Slang your knowledge in the comments.

Big Picture Categories: Sports Blogs

King’s Cup might be the best drinking game out there. Everyone has their own version, there’s ample drinking and sometimes — on a few lucky occasions — hot chicks end up naked. One of the best “games” in King’s Cup is Categories, which often is represented by the Jack card. In Categories, the person who draws the card says a category (fast food joints, baseball stadiums, etc.) and everyone must go around the circle naming one until somebody stumbles. When that person fucks up, they drink. Make sense? Good.

We are in, what seems like anyway, the prime of sports blogging. In about five minutes, you can sign up for a Blogger account and be a published author. No experience needed. It’s kinda like crack in the 90s: sports blogging is the new cool thing.

With the ease (and fun, we might add) of sports blogging, there has gotta be somewhere near 300,000 sports blogs out there. That is an exaggeration, but unfortunately, not that big of one.

Today’s category then, we’ll be naming all independent sports blogs. What’s independent mean? No affiliation with a newspaper or mainstream media website. Use your judgment. We’ll start and you guys continue in the comments. You can go again after every five comments. One — one! — answer per comment, assbags. There are tons of these, so let’s set a new commenting record! Also, link to the site that you mention. First person to blow it has to shotgun a 40.

We’ll start with a favorite: The Hater Nation (NFL Adam told us if we said that, he’d buy our lunch when we visit him later this month).

All right, blog buddies. Start dishin’ out those URLs like Steve Nash assists.

*That’s a picture of “Mean Girls” co-star Lacey Chabert. When we did an image search for “sports blogs,” she was the third item that popped up. Weird. Anyway, here are some more pants-stirring, yet safe-for-work, pics of her.

Big Picture Categories: Super Bowl MVPs

King’s Cup might be the best drinking game out there. Everyone has their own version, there’s ample drinking and sometimes — on a few lucky occasions — hot chicks end up naked. One of the best “games” in King’s Cup is Categories, which often is represented by the Jack card. In Categories, the person who draws the card says a category (fast food joints, baseball stadiums, etc.) and everyone must go around the circle naming one until somebody stumbles. When that person fucks up, they drink. Make sense? Good.

Sunday’s the Super Bowl! HOLY SHIT! THE SUPER BOWL!!!! CAPS LOCK! EXCLAMATION POINT!!!

With XLII just a few days away, we’re starting to get Super Bowl fever. We have our potato chips, deep fryer and butt groove ready. To get even more in the mood, today’s category will be naming all the Super Bowl MVPs. We’ll start and you guys continue in the comments. You can go again after every five comments. One — one! — answer per comment, assbags. If you look these up at some reference site or something, your penis will fall off. Honor system, people. First person to mess up has to deep fry a beer.

We’ll start with a random one: Dexter Jackson (Tampa Bay, Super Bowl XXXVII).

All right, Super Bowl nuts. Brag about your useless knowledge in the comments.

Big Picture Categories: Super Bowl sites

King’s Cup might be the best drinking game out there. Everyone has their own version, there’s ample drinking and sometimes — on a few lucky occasions — hot chicks end up naked. One of the best “games” in King’s Cup is Categories, which often is represented by the Jack card. In Categories, the person who draws the card says a category (fast food joints, baseball stadiums, etc.) and everyone must go around the circle naming one until somebody stumbles. When that person fucks up, they drink. Make sense? Good.

We’re less than two weeks away from the Super Bowl and we’re about as it excited for it as we are a trip to the dentist. Nonetheless, it is the Super Bowl which is a great excuse to drink piss beer on a Sunday afternoon. Not that you needed an excuse…

With the big game on the horizon, today’s category will be naming all the cities that have hosted a Super Bowl. This is Super Bowl XLII, but with all the repeat cities, we’re guessing that there have been about 30 host sites. So let’s get ’em all! We’ll start and you guys continue in the comments. You can go again after every five comments. One — one! — answer per comment, assbags. First person to blow it gets to have a run-in with Ray Lewis in a dark alley.

We’ll start with a recent one: Detroit (Super Bowl XL).

All right, football fans. Show off your Super Bowl knowledge in the comments.

Big Picture Categories: Quarterback Busts

King’s Cup might be the best drinking game out there. Everyone has their own version, there’s ample drinking and sometimes — on a few lucky occasions — hot chicks end up naked. One of the best “games” in King’s Cup is Categories, which often is represented by the Jack card. In Categories, the person who draws the card says a category (fast food joints, baseball stadiums, etc.) and everyone must go around the circle naming one until somebody stumbles. When that person fucks up, they drink. Make sense? Good.

[Editor’s note: We’re running low on these, so if you have any good future Categories (preferably sports-related), leave a comment or send an email to zachls5@gmail.com]

The NFL Draft is right around the corner — frankly it’s like the only sporting event that gets us really excited this time of year, besides March Madness, of course. That’s right, fuck the Super Bowl. Corporate bullshit overshadows the game. Anyway, when you think NFL Draft, one of the first things to come to mind is QBs who went bust.

Today’s category then will be naming all those first-round quarterbacks that never panned out. What’s considered a bust? Well, use your judgment. But if a guy was picked three years ago (2005 Draft) or more recently, he’s not eligible. So Young Alex Smith won’t count…yet. We’ll start and you guys continue in the comments. You can go again after every five comments. First person to mess up has to convince his team’s GM to take on Smith’s $50 million contract.

We’ll start with another 49er who sucked goat nuts: Jim Druckenmiller.

Let’s go, Draft fans. Slang your QB-bust knowledge in the comments.

(Big ups to James of Horsetoothed.com for the idea).

Big Picture Categories: ESPN Analysts

King’s Cup might be the best drinking game out there. Everyone has their own version, there’s ample drinking and sometimes — on a few lucky occasions — hot chicks end up naked. One of the best “games” in King’s Cup is Categories, which often is represented by the Jack card. In Categories, the person who draws the card says a category (fast food joints, baseball stadiums, etc.) and everyone must go around the circle naming one until somebody stumbles. When that person fucks up, they drink. Make sense? Good.

[Editor’s note: We’re running low on these, so if you have any good future Categories (preferably sports-related), leave a comment or send an email to zachls5@gmail.com]

When you start breaking down the big games, there are none better than the gargantuan crew of ESPN analysts. They range from bull riding to the law and everything in between. Most of them are pretty good, though there are those few former athletes who can’t properly form a sentence or speak coherently.

Since we’ve been seeing plenty of ESPN “talent” on TV lately with the NFL playoffs, BCS shit and the NBA in full swing, today’s category will be naming all analysts on ESPN and the ESPN family of networks. Let’s keep this current, meaning everyone’s favorite, Harold Reynolds, doesn’t count. We’ll start and you guys continue in the comments. You can go again after every five comments. First person to blow it gets to play spin the bottle with Sean Salisbury.

We’ll start with one of our favorites: Kirk Herbstreit.

All right, TV fans. Spill your ESPN knowledge in the comments.

Big Picture Categories: Sports families

King’s Cup might be the best drinking game out there. Everyone has their own version, there’s ample drinking and sometimes — on a few lucky occasions — hot chicks end up naked. One of the best “games” in King’s Cup is Categories, which often is represented by the Jack card. In Categories, the person who draws the card says a category (fast food joints, baseball stadiums, etc.) and everyone must go around the circle naming one until somebody stumbles. When that person fucks up, they drink. Make sense? Good.

No too relevant, but damn, there are a lot of families who have had multiple members play sports. Brothers, father and sons, cousins…sports are a big, incestuous community.

Today’s category will be naming all players, coaches, etc. who have had a relative play in a professional sports league. Let’s keep it to the big four (MLB, NFL, NBA, NHL). Relatives don’t have to have played at the same time. We’ll start and you guys continue in the comments. You can go again after every five comments. First person to fuck up has to pound some bottom-shelf vodka and chase it with bottom-shelf gin.

We’ll start with an obvious one: the Griffeys.

All right, people. Spit your knowledge of sports’ best families in the comments.